I always seem to get this close to permanently give up on you and then you ceaselessly fight until you win my love back. Why do you do that, eh? Why? And once things are going well again; I promise myself to not freak out when you cut your style but somehow it always gets to me! You come across as such a prankster… a real teaser!
Humour me if you will.
What do I do when I am more inclined to believe without a doubt that the sun is shining even when it is engulf by the blackest clouds? I am finding it harder to belief that God is always there even when there are signs that He is. I am at the point where I believe that God is real only in my imagination and frankly that is what the only concept of God that will ever make sense to me.
I guess this has happened more times than I can care to entertain. You know how much I detest the way you sometimes tease and test my availability to make you my only lover and provider yet sometime the devil’s crumbs seem more sumptuous an offer than waiting to get all the bountiful gifts you have reserved for me; yet I do not plan on giving up on my dreams because of some overwhelming fear that you will snatch them away from me or enticing offer in exchange for my heartfelt longing.
I suppose that is the high of delayed gratification… and this is what keeps me holding on to you God so never mind those memos of how much you love me and will always care and be there to meet all my needs and fulfil all my dreams, enough promises- reveal your full omnipotence… just do it already, Real McCoy!
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