If someone had predicted to me that I would one day, or in an instant, lose the need to fight the outcome of life circumstances even it was killing me to do so, I would have fighter even harder.
I recall reading somewhere that surrendering does not mean one is weak and now I believe the truth in this saying! I think that is what triggered my mind to give up the fight to compete for Atlas’ title. My need to always be on the go and in some mad dash to overthrow Atlas has lost its appeal and hold on my life. All I want to do now is rest, without feeling strange about doing so. I feel that this is getting me better attune with real surrender confident that there is nothing to fight with to prove that my life and every ones' life is important.
I am finding that I am more bold about my rifts with Life and since then I have been enjoying the need to just relax even when I am not always sure how to express the new found deep level of freedom from flee-fight.
April 27, 2008
Pain: from ouch to mm-mm…mm-mm-mm!
The pain indicator which summoned the body’s cry for help by constantly flashing its emergency warning signal that the body was in survival mode and barely hanging on, is slowly and surely bowing out from duty after decades of service. It looks forward very much to retirement and it is with utmost pleasure that is applauds its successor- pain that signals me to continue caring, honouring and respecting the whole person as it is being restored, renewed and recharged.
Crystallized emotions and cells enjoy deep massages and gentle touch and stimulation especially the soul-spirit connection kind that reminds one that s/he is never alone; kind of like the invisible touch contact. I suppose that is why I can relate even more innately with Omnipresence. Being ad lib to that kind of awareness is what this current status of pain is serenading me to continue aiming for. I used to so want a God that I could see, touch, feel, taste and smell and a God with ears that I could grab with two hands and bring his head close enough so I could really scream a deafening scream that no one else would hear; moreover a God with tongue, teeth and cheek who could talk to me and tell me how I am doing.
This kind of pain makes me moan with content as I continue to stay in tune with what I am feeling and, doing something, even a little something to assist the body to its point of optimal restore balance. I look forward to never having my body to sound its alarms like it used to before it got my undivided attention to move from ouch-ouch to yum-yum.
A simple ounce of proaction is by far, much better than the short-term effect of tonnes of painkillers and denial.
I recall reading somewhere that surrendering does not mean one is weak and now I believe the truth in this saying! I think that is what triggered my mind to give up the fight to compete for Atlas’ title. My need to always be on the go and in some mad dash to overthrow Atlas has lost its appeal and hold on my life. All I want to do now is rest, without feeling strange about doing so. I feel that this is getting me better attune with real surrender confident that there is nothing to fight with to prove that my life and every ones' life is important.
I am finding that I am more bold about my rifts with Life and since then I have been enjoying the need to just relax even when I am not always sure how to express the new found deep level of freedom from flee-fight.
April 27, 2008
Pain: from ouch to mm-mm…mm-mm-mm!
The pain indicator which summoned the body’s cry for help by constantly flashing its emergency warning signal that the body was in survival mode and barely hanging on, is slowly and surely bowing out from duty after decades of service. It looks forward very much to retirement and it is with utmost pleasure that is applauds its successor- pain that signals me to continue caring, honouring and respecting the whole person as it is being restored, renewed and recharged.
Crystallized emotions and cells enjoy deep massages and gentle touch and stimulation especially the soul-spirit connection kind that reminds one that s/he is never alone; kind of like the invisible touch contact. I suppose that is why I can relate even more innately with Omnipresence. Being ad lib to that kind of awareness is what this current status of pain is serenading me to continue aiming for. I used to so want a God that I could see, touch, feel, taste and smell and a God with ears that I could grab with two hands and bring his head close enough so I could really scream a deafening scream that no one else would hear; moreover a God with tongue, teeth and cheek who could talk to me and tell me how I am doing.
This kind of pain makes me moan with content as I continue to stay in tune with what I am feeling and, doing something, even a little something to assist the body to its point of optimal restore balance. I look forward to never having my body to sound its alarms like it used to before it got my undivided attention to move from ouch-ouch to yum-yum.
A simple ounce of proaction is by far, much better than the short-term effect of tonnes of painkillers and denial.
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