Moments of martyrdom made me wish that I was unaffiliated to the saint who I am honoured to be associated with and voluntarily accept as me in another lifetime. Sometimes courage seem like in it is the very core of cowardness simply because for me the gruesome grandeur of sainthood acclaimed by human doing is not my vision of serving God and dying for God sake even though I am still innocent of why I resurrected. How I resurrected? Well you have to be me to experience the howness of nowness. I know for sure just like a baby trust that it is what it is!
Oftentimes I marvel at how the Catholic Church did not hail Jesus as a martyr and call him St. Jesus instead he is called Saviour, God and, Son of God as if Son of God is a title of favour and Saint is for the less worthy candidates of courage, confidence and compassion. I dare confess that Jesus is not the only one who resurrected from the dead. What God can do for Jesus God can do for every Godman and Godwoman!
As Universe continues to support my willingness to allow it to dissolve the accumulated debt of doubt, I consciously choose to walk tall inside-out even with the ouch-factor taking its toll on my nerves right now. I accept this as part of the resurrection process and so groan, grown and moving along I lead my own life
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