Personal Growth

The more I tried to imagine God, the more I confined her to time and space and God cannot be contained. So how do I describe his or comprehend his image. I felt that the best way was to start by knowing myself. That required me to spend time quality time with myself, all of myself. Isn’t that what is required of me before I know anyone else? Even more so isn't that what I expect someone to do for himself before we can truly enjoy intimacy? I think it is jolly well the same with God.

What a task it was to know who I am. I no longer want to be defined by another’s idea of who I should be. Challenging the false notion of who I am and its disquieting comfort of its familiarity meant giving up the dread of ‘what if” when I give up its security. That was a wrestling match that I thought would never ease. The risk this holy struggle involved came with a price tag that is worth my ultimate reward- inner freedom and a peace that no amount of temporal wealth can purchase and a lesson I shall not forget-God doesn’t allow anyone to write the script of another’s life.

Now that I can identify with God, I can stop running away from myself and instead romance with my newfound lover… my self. . I no longer spend all my time constructing God. Instead, I enjoy an intimate relationship with God. Phew! I thought that was a farfetched goal but it was just a matter of time.