God already knows everything about me. He never makes up his face or holds his breath when he uncovers the major boo boos and scars that covered the festered wound- the stinky smellies- that I had spent years nursing by hiding and burying my emotions. He is in the midst of my confused state of mind while my heart faints within me as I contemplate what he is preparing me to accomplish on his higher ground. I have been weeping, moaning and groaning as God is running my life through His heavy-duty grinder. He is honing my attention, by orchestrating all the details and conducting them into my daily life activities. He teaches me to see the business of living though his eyes. He is teaching me to know everything about him, about myself and, about all people.
In order to accomplish this, he had to rip off the band-aid…. yawch… and let everything spew. Then he washed me in a mixture of Jesus' blood and tears. He breathed into what was left of me and I immediately realized how dead I had been. He rubbed in the balm of redemption salve in my diseased mind and polluted body and began treating the repressed emotions from years of unfelt feelings and unthought thinking. He resurrected dreams that were asleep; deep desires sprung to life; feelings that were denied regain their significance and thoughts that were disowned began to make themselves known.
I was set free; free to soar like an eagle.
Since then, I have stopped doing the toiling and enjoy resting while God runs the show and fight the battles; all I ever have to do is trust him to do what he promised to do...to complete the work that he began in me so that I can give him all the praise and glory.
Nowadays, I focus more on what is, instead of what seem to be.
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